Posts Tagged ‘Recipes’
Dear Korean Mother, Take Me To Grandma.
- My Nail Lady: Kelly, MFA.
Your mom didn’t invite her nail lady to Christmas dinner last year? Rude.
Your nail lady doesn’t give you Korean snacks? That’s weird.
Introducing Kelly, owner of Galleria Nail Salon, distinguished modern painter, and Korean matriarch extraordinaire. Her high-pitched voice is kind of like Glenda the Good Witch with a Korean accent, shouting my name when I walk in “Brooooooooooooke!” It’s like music to my ears.
Kelly is my source for all things Korean. She introduced me to flavored seaweed (which she’s holding), she calls me when her mother makes a fresh batch of kimchee, and has sparked a penchant for instant Korean noodles throughout my social circle.
The fact that I love Korean food and will try anything she puts in front of me basically blows her freaking mind. On several occasions (and not just the time she asked me to be a hand model), she has asserted:
“I am your Korean Mother, I am your American Mother, I am your Jewish Mother!”
So my point is, get on board. Head to your local Asian market, and pick up some seaweed, kimchee and Nongshim brand Shin Ramyun noodle soup. (Trust me, it’s not like that crap you ate in college while saving up cash for Cancun.)
Nong Shim Noodle Soup...extreme spice alert.
Snack on the seaweed solo, or make a little burrito with rice and kimchee. Shin Ramyun noodle soup is spicy, dynamic and delicious. (And cheap, perfect if you’re saving up cash for Buenos Aires.) In general, Asia tends to struggle with the Western concept of patent laws. Achieve passive revenge by inviting guests over for this instant noodle soup “souped up” with tofu, kimchee, mushrooms, bamboo shoots, bok choy, edamame beans…whatever. Just don’t add any more heat…it’s spicy enough, and too spicy for nerds/wimps.
In closing, this post is dedicated to my favorite Korean lady. If you’re a New Yorker, please hit up her business to get those gross feet prepped for summer. Tell her I sent you, and apply peer pressure for my ultimate Korean wish:
This is an official plea to Kelly, my Korean mother…take me to Grandma. For years I’ve been begging to meet this lady and get an authentic cooking lesson. Let me at that lady! I’m already picturing us drinking tea in your Flushing apartment, sampling kimchee and making bibimbop. Ripe material for Edible Humor’s upcoming video series…
Side Note: Kelly used to always try to set me up with her other male clients, which grossed me out conceptually. Low and behold, one of her favorite new customers is Dr. What’s His Name, who occasionally patronizes her establishment to buff up his claws before a big day spent outside the Latex. (Gloves. Latex gloves. Scrape up your mind from the gutter!)
Mid-May Greenmarket Bounty
Eat me.
Farmer’s Markets can be overwhelming.
Between wanting to buy 8 pounds of every available option, feeling guilty for forgetting my organic cotton tote bag and instead requesting (gasp!) plastic bags, and accepting strawberry samples from hot farmer-tanned rural-hipsters in farm t-shirts…it’s a lot to manage on a personal level. And it’s only May, so if the market conditions are a lot to handle now, then by August I could lose my mind.
Last week I picked up the above selection…spinach, asparagus, chives, leeks, garlic and shallots. Along with some seafood, frozen peas and pasta…the delicious dinner for my friend Morgan was whipped on on a rainy weeknight.
RECIPE:
Prepare pasta…al dente.
Sauté minced garlic and shallots in your oil of choice, with salt, pepper and a dash of red pepper flakes. When soft, push to the outside of the pan and add a small pat of butter to the middle. Sauté shrimp until pink and scallops until slightly browned (seasoned with S & P). Remove and set aside. Add thinly sliced leeks and asparagus (1/4 in dice)…and allow to hang out for a few. Add about a cup of vegetable or chicken stock, and bring to a boil. Scrape the bits off the pan. After stock is cooked down, add spinach, frozen peas and sun dried tomatoes. Finish off by mixing in about 2 oz (half of small log) of herb goat cheese. Return sea creatures, pasta and top with chopped chives.
If you get irritated with the lack of detail in recipes posted…I apologize. Everything is eyeballed and made up…which explains why I’m such a shitty baker. In the above recipe, I used 4-5 stalks of asparagus and probably 3/4 cup of peas…heavy on the veg and easy on the pasta. Opening weekend of flesh season is upon us, after all.
Korean food is delicious and I pretty much think the world needs to get on board. One of their trademark dishes is bulgogi, marinated beef served with lettuce, rice and spicy bean paste. Technically speaking, it’s part of the burrito family of food vehicles.
Merquez Sausage Lettuce Wraps with Roasted Red Pepper Sauce
Available at the Greenmarket in Union Square
During a recent Saturday being an average white person and hanging out at a farmer’s market, I picked up some Merquez sausage. If you haven’t had breakfast at Cafe Mogador [101 St. Marks Pl., NYC], Merquez is a spicy lamb sausage from where Spain, Africa and the Middle East collide. This special Moroccan treat has been waiting patiently in the freezer, until last night.
Originally, I was going to sauté the sausage and serve with homemade tabbouleh salad. But, my box of bulgur wheat had been victimized by colony of insects. (Totally gross, but don’t judge me unless you want a karmic case of head lice…or crabs.) At a loss, I ransacked my options and settled on a Korean-Middle Eastern lovechild: Merquez Sausage Lettuce Wraps.
Rice: Sautéed onions and garlic mixed with rice, chopped tomato, with lemon juice, lemon zest and oregano.
Sauce: Roasted red peppers, Greek yogurt, lemon juice, lemon zest, a lil’ honey, oregano, salt & pepper…pureed in a food processor.
Sausage: Sautéed in onion/garlic pan.
Wrap up in a crunchy leaf of lettuce and voilà!
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